Personal stuff

Let's get personal!

I just poo.

Oopsss! I guess no one wants to know this kind of personal stuff.

Someone just said I am choosy in choosing boyfriend.

I am open to criticism, but I laughed when I heard that I am choosy.

Let's analyse this choosy matter.

To be choosy, I have to have some choice to choose. Let's list down all my options..

1. An Nigerian man, whom I met in Dubai International Airport, asked for my email address, but refused by me.

2. An African who thinks I am interesting because I listen to Bob Marley songs.

3. Few Egyptian men who proposed to me.

4. A bus driver who wanted me to be his third wife.

5. A South African man who invited me to join him on his Bali vacation, He is around 55 years old. We met on plane.

6. A good guy (Malaysian), but we have nothing much in common, kind of ran out of topic after a while.

Will you make a choice out of the list?

Now you can tell me, am I really choosy?

Interrogation

Interrogation began...

Do you talk to him?!

How often did you talk to him?!

Where did you two go to?!

Why do you ask me about him?!!

Aahhhh!! Help me!

I am innocent! I never think of seducing him! We are just normal friends!!!

That's why I wise up. I have to check every guy's marital status or relationship status when I befriend him.

If the guy is in relationship with someone, is better not to be too close.

Even if we were best friend, our friendship have to be loosened and be just friend. From a friend who can talk about anything to a friend who will say hi and bye.

I don't want to be responsible to any broken relationship due to misunderstanding.

Long Distance Relationship guidance

Read an article regarding long distance relationship, there are some guidance to a successful LDR. I think all the guidance are practical and useful. Here are the guidance taken from here.

1. Yap it Up. This might be the only time in life when being a chatter box is a virtue.  When your significant other is far away the best way to feel close is to paint them a little picture of your world as often as possible.  Tell them about the bum you stopped to give a buck to or the baby in line at the bank who wouldn’t stop screaming profanities at his mother (true story).  When space and time is set between you, there’s no detail that’s too mundane to share.
2. Ground Rules. Don’t be shy about it…tell it how you see it.  If you think monogamy is too much to ask for, say so.  If you want a phone call every morning, let it be known.  Having a routine is the best way to have constant and unspoken reassurance that you’re flying at the same altitude.  And the only way to obtain a routine is to agree on all points of the relationship.
3. The Honey Fund. Let me be the first to state…long distance relationships are not for those with thin wallets.  If you want it to work, you’re going to have to work that frequent flyer program for all its worth.  Mutually putting aside funds to help with travel plans is a good way to keep the load balanced.
4. Computer Love. OK, how do I put this…?  There are some areas that will be…lacking, in a long distance relationship.  And the best way to fill in the gap (pardon the pun) is to get to know your computer.  REALLY WELL.  Install a camera and get some good lighting, because the best relationship saver when it comes to long distance is good ole fashioned cyber “relations”.
5. Timelines.  Finally, but not least importantly, is creating a timeline.  If he thinks the long distance is for good and she’s waiting for him to move to her city, things will quickly go from bad to ugly.  One thing is for sure, it HAS to end at some point.  There has to be a point set where the long distance part of the relationship comes to an end.  If this isn’t something that’s possible, I’m afraid you’ll just be swimming in an endless circle.

What do you think of these guidance?

About Josh

Just read a post by Josh. It is about his experience with woman. Read here.

As a lady, I admit that every lady always dream to have a rich knight, a rich prince charming as their boyrfriend or husband. In his sex drive, he had only 1st and only date with a cute lady, because the lady mind his humble car. Is car really that important for a man? Whenever a guy fetch me with his old car, the guy will always apologized for his old car. I don't get it. His self confidence is based on his car?

Personally I am fond of old car which is preserved in good condition. As it is not easy to do so nowadays.

I had 3 experiences with old car:

a) old car with cold aircon - The owner is a nice guy. Too bad we ran out of topic to talk after a period of courtship.

b) old car with japanese words - This one... sentenceless. Rejected me because I have no car.

c) old car with center lock - Nothing going on with this one, but no harm admiring a cute one.

Seems to have bad destiny with cars. I will go for tractor next time.

Surprise! Surprise!

Suddenly, my 4 years friend told me that she is getting married in May. She never told me that she is in a relationship. Hence, when she told me bout her coming wedding, I did not believe her and thought she was just kidding. She said my response was the funniest one among those few people whom she told about it. At the moment she told me the news, I asked, "you must be kidding," and took it as just a breeze which brush by my shoulder. When I saw her expression, laughing at me, I felt something is amiss. Clearly, she was not joking!

Her reason of keeping her marital status a secret is only marriage matters. Dating or relationship before married, all that are not reliable and everything can change easily. Other than marriage, not worth of announcing, only the stage of marriage is counted as confirmation of a relationship. Hope you get what I meant. Conclusion is that If you dating for 10 years, all those 10 years are not counted if you do not get married.

I agree with her. Dating or sweet talk may become waste of time and feeling, if there is no marriage. A relationship need to be kept a secret because the other half is private property. When a relationship is disclosed to public, many people may speak in ill manner of the relationship. One word, 'DANGEROUS!'

I really admire my friend. She managed to keep it a secret for many years, even her mum did not know about it. While her mother lamenting how her daughter may end up to be a spinster, she is preparing a plan to start a family. Her mother wasted her time worrying for her.

While I was sulking, asking her, will I lose a friend after that.. She comforted me by saying she will still go jogging and swimming.

Advices:

Forcing won't bring happiness.

Let nature takes its course.

Life is like gambling.

Falling in love is like going to a battlefield, injuries are expected

'Falling in love is like going to a battlefield, injuries are expected.' Someone posted this on Facebook today.

This... I know this too. However it is different when the pain comes. 

It is easier for ladies to fall in love. Often, it is only one sided feeling. The guy most probably only like the lady as ordinary friend. 

There are many tips on how to tell a guy is into you. One of the tips may be, 'If a guy treats you very good, laugh when he hears you laugh." Guys also treat an ordinary friend very good. He may laugh at your joke just because you are ordinary friend. So all tips are not dependable. As ladies tend to think too much, so our heart is not dependable too. If you ask me what else is trustable? I have no answer to that. Maybe not many men know that ladies also tend to think they are failure, when our love is rejected. We ladies are really complicated.

Nothing is dependable, even men are not dependable. I think that men also change their mind as fast as they drop their pants to do big business in toilet. A man can be very decisive in their career. However, when comes to relationship, I don't think so. Men can feel insecure in wooing lady or involving into a relationship. Doubts such as 'will I be able to support her?', 'she is too pretty', 'my car is too old to let her ride in it', bla bla bla. One word for you, "50% chance of winning if you try, 0% if you gave up before even trying. You lose before even trying."

Men is so indecisive, that sometimes it can hurt many people during the process of doubting. Communication is important even when in indecisive situation. Even if a courting process does not ended up with a relationship, if there are good understanding from both side, no one will be hurt in the process.

Clarification is important. After courtship and understanding process, you may found out you are not compatible, is better to be truthful and clarify the matter. Without any clarification, it will be unfinished business. 'Buang tahi tapi tidak cuci burit' = Not wiping your ass after pooing. Ladies and gentleman, don't be a coward in this matter. As it is regarding human's feeling and heart. Scarring will only make a heart hardened. A hard heart is unhealthy and bear much grudge. After died, will become a wandering ghost.

As we get older, love won't be the priority when looking for a life partner. No one like to spend old life alone. Companionship will be the most important. No matter how old a person can be, companionship is important. Some old people find companionship in their grandchildren, relatives, or friends. That is why you may found many old man playing chess in parks, practicing taichi, or joined a singing group. Love won't be as important as understanding and good companionship.

Just some analysis from a couchlady, Nomi.

Pondering "Don't ever compare your boyfriend/girlfriend with your ex."

Usually in tips about relationship, one of the tips will be:

"Don't ever compare your boyfriend/girlfriend with your ex."

Seiously, why would someone choose bf/gf who acts like her/his ex?

I do not think anyone will want someone to remind her/him about her/his ex. It is suffering enough without anyone reminds her/him about the EX. It is better to apply Aloe vera cream on the wound than salt.

Personally, I will want to avoid attracted to anyone who reminds me of my ex. History is better be left alone, and not to be repeated.

I am sure the one you having now is much better than your ex. If you have the tendency to compare, just said "you are much better than my ex, you won't be mine if you are no better."

The End.

However, the pondering still continues....................

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